My Top Nine Crazy Roommate Stories

For the Don’t Trust the B in Apartment 23 Funniest Roommates Contest I made a video “MY INSANE ROOMMATE” - which you should all vote on (I have 24 hours of self promotion left, so I might as well roll with it). Aside: you can vote once a day, so vote again HERE (using google/youtube account)

So in the spirit of terrible roommates, I give you my terrible roommates stories.  Please share yours in the comments.

1.  The College Seniors who would throw keggers on Friday mornings at 8 am.  The girls would NEVER warn me. Then they would black out by noon, lose their jewelry/phones/clothes and then accuse me of stealing it.

2.  The SAME girls as in Number 1 who would knock on my door at 11pm, saying that my phone rang too loud and it disturbed them.

3.  I lived in a hippy co-op for two years (don’t ask).  We lived with a nudist, who used the van outside as his bedroom, which was totally fine (I ain’t picky).  but then the nudist couch surfers arrived.  I punched one when his junk got a little too close to my face.

4.  The roommate who was “on a diet” and worst of all, the Atkin’s Diet.  She would fry up FOUR SAUSAGES and shove them in her mouth with her pudgy hands.  THEN she’d smoke some weed and order the 5-5-5 deal (Remember that?) from Domino’s.  She would eat all of them to herself.  She wouldn’t share any pizza and then would eat the entire 3 pizzas over the course of 24 hours. In the meantime, the boxes would be placed around her on her bed.  I still can never look at pizza in the same way again

5.  HIPPIES.

6.  The girls I dub “The Trolls”.  Two LARGE sisters who sometimes had maggots growing on their dishes.  When I forgot to do my dishes on my birthday, they had a house meeting to discuss how inconsiderate I am.

7.  A roommate who after complaining for weeks about how she needs to do laundry, appropriates my underwear.  I found this out when I spotted it when she was wearing a mini skirt.  A girl’s gotta learn how to cross her legs.

8.  The Generic Drunk Person: Peed in my closet, forgot that he ate all my corn dogs blacked out, threw up in the shower, threw up in the kitchen sink, threw up in the freezer, hosted a party in my bedroom, etc…

9.  The roommate who threw the toaster against the wall when she found she was getting evicted.

Bad Roommates… Any good stories?

REMEMBER TO VOTE HERE SO I CAN WIN 5 GRAND

 

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2 thoughts on “My Top Nine Crazy Roommate Stories

  1. College roommate “Trooch” refused to do the dishes when it was his turn, so they piled up in the sink. Two of us got done with midterms early and left for Easter Break.
    I was the first one back. The sink was empty, but there was a horrific smell. Trooch had cleaned out the sink and put the dirty dishes, pots and pans in the oven.

    • I wonder if the inventor of the oven could have predicted the way slobs would use it for deception. my housemate used to dry his hair in the oven… yes, by sticking his head in the oven.

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